First Kiss

I can still recall the line spoken by Rhett Butler in Gone with the Wind: "You should be kissed and often and by someone who knows how."

Kissing. This verbal noun in the -ing form remains a mystery to me. I am not afraid or ashamed to admit it. I still haven't my first lip lock yet. I know, I know, it does not surprise you having known the kind of life I lead - singular, bland, unromantic.

I see fictional characters kiss all the time - especially in classic movies. They have this really fascinating way to pull off such grand display of affection. I mean losing all your senses, being intoxicated with the dew from your lovers lips, the softness and all. I am on my toes whenever people kiss, much more when i see it in public. I read every little detail in the book that tells about the soulful, sweet sensation that only kisses can give. Gosh, I'm sure am waiting for that to happen.

But may I ask, is it really how it seems? I mean, are kisses everything they say or show it is? Because it is as if having my first kiss will be a milestone in my singular, bland, unromantic life! What if it really is nothing to what I'm expecting?  Or maybe it turns out to be so much more than I could ever dream of? I suppose the person I will be with (future boyfriend?) has a lot to do with it.

I am still waiting patiently for my first kiss to come true. Maybe, it will come. Maybe tomorrow, or the next day, or month or year or maybe never. But I will be totally damned if I die without having lip-locked with someone. Nonetheless, if it will happen, I won't rush it. I want it happen when it is suppose to happen. It may make me old-fashioned, but I want to share it with someone who is going to make me remember it for years. Now, whether I'm smiling because it was so utterly romantic or because it was so utterly awkward is an entirely different story.

Still thinking about kissing. I just can't sleep tonight. I've kissed people in my dreams though. Only in my dreams, you may say. I've sang songs about kisses. But these lines really bite me.

When he danced he held me tight
and when he walked me home that night
all the stars were shining bright
and then he kissed me...

...He kissed me in a way that I've never been kissed before,
he kissed me in a way that I wanna be kissed forever more.